Something I have come to realize is how grateful I am for the hard times.
Now I can only say this because I am out of one now, because truth be told when I was in it, I wasn’t thinking that. (But I do hope that as time goes on, I can endure them with a lot more peace and trust.)
I was questioning, I was frustrated, I was tired and angry.
I didn’t want to learn anything new, I didn’t want to have to go through another challenge, I just wanted life to be easy, just for a moment.
For the most part, things are clearer in hindsight.
And I can look back and see how much I needed that season.
It humbled me, it challenged me, it brought me to big realizations and moments that have changed me.
It allowed me to see my pride and stubbornness.
It allowed me to see the fears and insecurities that were keeping me from moving on with my life.
It has allowed me to let the Lord heal the broken areas of my heart which I tried to hold together myself.
He showed me, especially through my little mare, what trust looks like, what love looks like.
For in some of the hardest situations we face, we come to realize that we need to let it go and give it to Him.
That trying to hold onto control does nothing but burn us out, but once we surrender it to Him, He can make it into something.
It is a beautiful thing when we come to realize that all we have, has nothing to do with ourselves.
Sure we’ve had to work for it, we’ve had to step out in faith to grab a hold of it – but we truly only have it because of Him.
Because of Him who is Lord over all things.
A God who loves us; who is willing to teach us, grow us, challenge us and show us His grace and mercy.
We go through hard times and we go through great times, but through it all He remains the same.
Faithful, enduring, everlasting and forever true to His promises.
Whatever we face, may we have the faith and courage to look to Him.
For whatever He asks us to lay down is always for something greater.
Looking back, although it was tough, I am thankful for it.
For it has shaped my character, showed me the value of relationships and my great need to look to the Lord for help rather than try to do it on my own.
I was able to see His goodness in simple treasures such as Agape and I working better together, the amazing people I have been given in my life, the contentment which comes when finding peace within myself and letting go of all that I’ve been holding onto.
This all being said,
Keep on moving forward.
Persevere, keep looking to Him and allowing Him to heal your heart.
In this hardship He is with you, He is for you and will never leave you nor forsake you.
For in our times of trouble we realize we must live in His strength and not our own,
That we can’t control our own lives because He is in complete control and that’s a good thing because if we were in control we would continue to mess our lives up and lose sight of what truly matters.
But with Him in control, we are reminded of that which truly matters in this world and are never left alone to deal with the harder things.
We also realize that in hindsight we may have not gotten what we thought we wanted but He gave us what we truly needed.
Keep looking ahead, this too shall pass and you will hopefully come through victorious (by His grace) with your heart softened and faith a little stronger.
Above all else remember to draw near to Him rather than turn away. It is far too easy in hard times to run from Him rather than towards Him. But lean into Him, ask for help and let Him walk through it with you. When we go through hard seasons seeking the Lord we can come out of it holding more, but when we lose sight of Him and dwell on all that we have lost, are loosing or don’t seem to be getting, then we’ll only come out of it more hurt, bitter and angry.
“In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”
1 Peter 1:6-7
Because in the moments I wanted to give up on Agape.
The moments that seemed as though they were too tough to make it through,
Or the brokenness that I didn’t know how to fix or the problems that were past my knowledge,
Were all worth it and I am glad I endured it.
By the encouragement/help of others and the Lords gentle reassurance,
I can look at my mare and see all that the Lord has done with her but mostly with me.
I am thankful for this hard long process because of what it has brought into my life and the character it has brought out of me.
Keep going forward, it only gets better.
Take a minute to read Hebrews 12
I pray that as you go through this hard season or when you come across another one, that you are able to walk through it was His peace, with clarity and courage. May your faith continue to be strengthened, heart softened and your love grow greater for the King of kings who cares for you.